Sunday, 26 August 2012

Connecting People (not Nokia)


I always find human communication a very fascinating subject.  We are the only species on earth known to have developed such a complex language in our communication process. Average people use 10,000 vocabularies, compared to dogs that only understand 250. Our communication has evolved to be more than just a survival tool. It is no longer just a necessity, it becomes our identity.   

Most of the theories and models out there define communication as transferring process. The object: information is exchanged between subjects: speakers and listeners.  By this definition, the main objective of communication is therefore to copy information (the ideal condition when the listeners get exactly what the speaker tells). While there is really nothing wrong with this concept, I prefer a more abstract but appealing way to see communication: that to communicate is to connect. By looking at this perspective, the consequence of failing communication is failing in relationship (it is applicable to social relationship, such as husband-wife, and also professional relationship, like buyer-seller, superior-subordinate). Communication also has a growing process: an effective communication will result in strong connection, and the more you connect the more efficient your communication (the conversation is no longer restricted by limited vocabs and knowledge).

Effective communication skills help us in connecting to other people. They are like tools and blueprints to build a robust bridge across the river. Using unsuitable tools will only result in more labor or even a failing bridge. While systematic approach provided by books and lectures might help in some way, the heart of communication profoundness can be seen in good advertisements. You know it is a good advertisement when you feel natural to have Coke with your Happy meals. When the connection is well built, the communication process can be effortless, spontaneous yet subtle. 

2 comments:

  1. The first definition of communication is very technical, but I like the way you gave communication a more abstract meaning, tying it in with the relationships we have with others. You have also brilliantly stated that the way we communicate becomes our identity. The analogy between communication and building bridges is also interesting.

    Your last line, however, makes me wonder if there is any difference between connection, and communication? I feel there may be a slight distinction between them, but they are definitely very closely related.

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  2. Perhaps a breakdown of what "building bridges" avtually entails might have been useful because at the end of the day, good commuication boils down to some very basic learnable skills and barring serious personality traits that hinder one from acquiring these skills, almost everyone can learn and master those skills with conscious practice.

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